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July 10, 2022

Don’t apologise for crying!…

Did you know, that when we cry, our tears act as a painkiller!!  Did you know that??  Well, I never did until a few years ago.  I thought I would share the following article with you on ‘The Science of Tears’.

For those of you who haven’t got time to read this article, tears basically contain high levels of the stress hormone cortisol.  They also contain proteins and manganese.  Therefore, the act of these chemicals leaving our bodies makes us feel relieved, calm and relaxed – albeit a pretty effective pain killer.  This is why we often feel so much better once we have had a good cry!

Now, working in the field of domestic abuse, I obviously sadly see a lot of women cry.  They always apologise to me for doing so.  Of course, I always tell them they have absolutely no need to apologise and I explain to them that actually it is good for them to cry and they should do it as often as they feel the need!

In the UK, I feel it is part of our culture to be brought up to have the ‘stiff upper lip’.  To not show emotion.  This, I believe, is especially true with men.  This is why we always feel the need to apologise when we break down and cry.  We feel embarrassed or even ashamed.  We are taught all too often to bottle things up and not share our sadness or confusion with anyone.  Clearly, this is the wrong message.  We can actually help heal ourselves by being open and honest with our emotions.

I for one, cry a lot! and whenever I feel like it!  I encourage all the women I work with to ‘let go’ and cry – release those stress hormones, feel better for doing it and be proud of showing your emotions. Men too. Don’t be ashamed to cry or to show your emotions. It doesn’t make you less of a man and do you know what? Women like a man that can cry and show their emotions.

So what are you waiting for??!! 💖

  • I first met Sharon back in 2000 when I went into a refuge she worked in after fleeing a violent relationship. I had two babies and virtually just a bag of clothes and a few toys with us. She helped me with appointments with the police, solicitors and..

    A survivor of domestic abuse.
  • I was fortunate enough to meet and work with Sharon when she was the Advocacy Manager at Woman’s Trust and I was working for Westminster City Council. During this time Sharon developed and managed the Independent Domestic Violence Advocacy Service..

    Ainslie O’Connor – Principal Advisor for the Department of the Premier and Cabinet – Adelaide, Australia.
  • Thank you so much for all the support you have given me. You really have been amazing, and to be honest, I wouldn’t have been able to cope with Child Protection without you. The amount of strength you have given me is totally priceless, even with..

    A survivor of domestic abuse.
  • I knew Sharon as a work colleague over ten years ago. At the time, she was supporting vulnerable people, some of them were homeless due to domestic abuse and substance misuse. For me, assisting such people was what anyone in her role would be expect..

    Ted Chanza, Head of Market Operations, Airtel Malawi Ltd, Lilongwe, Malawi, Africa.
  • I have known Sharon for 6 years and have had the pleasure of working alongside her when I chaired the Westminster MARAC. Sharon is a committed, empathetic supporter of women who are or have experienced domestic abuse. She regularly goes the extra m..

    Former Chair of The Westminster MARAC.
  • I was fortunate to have had Sharon as my support worker after 17 years of domestic violence and 4 children that had witnessed and gone through it with me. I was finally strong enough to stand up and protect myself and my children. Without Sharon’s ..

    A survivor of domestic violence.
  • Without the support and constant reassurance of Sharon, I know for a fact that I wouldn’t be where I am today. I am forever grateful to her. She is extremely dedicated and knowledgeable, having her on my side when dealing with someone as persistent..

    Anonymous survivor of Domestic Abuse.
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